Having been confined to the apartment for so long, Heather has become my only source of entertainment. But she is a great source. Just this morning, she was getting ready for work and had a bit of a situation. She had just gotten her suit dry cleaned and now there was a button missing. After she started to get upset, I decided to step in and save the day (you didn't know my superpower involved buttons?). I unbuttoned the jacket and then buttoned it starting from the TOP button instead of the second button.
THAT, was a close one. I had to sacrifice my secret identity as Button Man, but tragedy was averted. Now the townspeople will not have to run from the Hezilla (her name is Hezaa in Japan) that this travesty surely would have spawned. The Japanese have had to deal with enough of these supernatural creatures. But what will they do when she can't find the hat that she is wearing? Are my powers limited to the realm of buttons, or am I the Fantastic Four of brain farts? Only time will tell...
This message has been approved by the Heather Phipps and is not subject to scrutiny under the laws of mood swings (I know what you're thinking; this is like a release form that superficially frees parties from legal recourse, when we know that no such thing is possible. And you're right)
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
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